A reflection on rejection…
Whether you face rejection from a lover, a job, an audition, or even yourself, it often leaves behind a sense of failure and sometimes even humiliation. We are not always privy to the reasons behind someone’s choice, so it’s easy to blame them. However, deep down, I find myself digging into my insecurities and shortcomings.
Before delving into this topic, I must confess that I haven’t mastered the art of accepting rejection myself, but I’m working on it. I’ve encountered rejection frequently, and I still find myself wrestling with my reaction to it. I have applied to countless jobs, choreographic residencies, and writing opportunities throughout my career. I also realize that rejection is an integral part of these fields—a constant and unavoidable aspect of the trade. It’s the knowledge that not every role or situation will perfectly fit everyone that sometimes makes it a little easier. However, the sting of rejection can be pretty painful. Compounding this challenge is that I’m pursuing these opportunities in New York City, a relentless and competitive metropolis saturated with a million others vying for the same gigs.
With every application, I feel like Jerry Seinfeld’s character Barry the Bee in the animated Bee Movie, as he attempts to escape from an apartment through the window, but it’s closed. Without realizing the glass is there, he continually flies into it, slamming his body over and over while repeatedly saying, “This time, this time, this time,” before his exhausted little bee body stops and slides down to the windowsill.
That’s me but with my resume, cover letter, years filled with experience, and the unending hope that something is bound to stick if I throw enough spaghetti at the wall.
I’m curious to know how you navigate rejection. Can you brush it off and stay committed to your path? Or does rejection hinder your ambition, causing it to wither and maybe die?
Knowing when it’s time to move on, it requires a balance between perseverance and self-awareness. While persistence is crucial, it’s also essential to recognize that continuing on the same path may be detrimental to your well-being and personal growth. It’s okay to reassess your goals and explore new possibilities. My question is – can I pivot?
As for the thought of giving up, it’s essential to evaluate why you keep trying in the first place. Reconnect with your passion and remind yourself of the reasons that initially inspired you. Remember that setbacks and rejections are temporary. Perseverance, self-belief, and a healthy dose of self-compassion can go a long way in overcoming the challenges along the way.
Rejection can undoubtedly be disheartening and can shake our faith and happiness. However, it’s important to remember that the journey towards achieving our goals is rarely linear. Embracing rejection as part of the process can ultimately lead to personal growth, resilience, and a more profound sense of fulfillment when we do succeed.
So, instead of repeatedly flying into the closed window like Barry the Bee, I know I’m going to take a step back, reassess, and hopefully find the strength to persist, grow, and keep moving toward our aspirations.
I just might make a plate of spaghetti for dinner tonight! And maybe I’ll throw it at the wall – after all, it is the best way to see if it’s ready.
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